While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into theden.
"What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked.
"That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?"
"Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with thehammer.
Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It's twoo'clock in the morning!"
A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.
"I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she says.
"What's your secret for a long, happy life?"
"I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, everexercise."
"Wow, that's amazing," says the woman.
"How old are you?"
Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven.God comes and says "I want the men to make twolines.One line for the men that dominated their women on earthand the other line for the menthat were whipped by their women.Also, I want all the women to go with St Peter."
世上的每一个人都上了天堂 神说 :" 要男人分成两队 , 一是在世上控制女人的男人 ,另一是被女人鞭打的男人 .另外女子自成一队 , 跟着圣彼德去 ."
Said and done, and there are two lines. The line of the menthat were whipped was 100 mileslong,and the line of men that dominated women, there was only one man.
队伍列好后 , 一是被女人鞭打的 ,有 100 英里长 , 一是在世上控制女人的 ,仅有一人 .
God got mad and said. "You men should be ashamed of yourselves.I created you in my imageand you were all whipped by your mates.Look at the only one of my sons that stood up andmade me proud.Learn from him! Tell them, my son,how did you manage to be the only one onthat line?"The man said, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here."
神生气的说 :" 你们男人应该感到羞耻 ,我按照自己的形象创造了你们 ,而你们被女子鞭打 . 看看 , 我唯一的儿子 ,站着使我骄傲 . 你们应该向他学习 .告诉他们 , 儿子 ,你如何成为唯一站在这一队上的 ?"这男子回说 :" 我不知道 , 我太太叫我站在这的 !"